Bob:

I know that, for myself, I could only depend on me (as a child) for any decisions and important aspects of my life. That, unfortunately, has carried over into my adult life. I find it very hard to ask for help, but have found that it is absolutely necessary for this process to go on.

A true lesson for me was after back operation #3 and I was confined to the bed for several weeks. My neighbor, without being asked, came over one afternoon and started mowing my lawn. I remember being very uncomfortable because I'm so used to doing things for myself. My wife looked at me and said, "You need to graciously accept the help and know that people care for you and WANT to do these things." I'll never forget that incident.

What Larry said is so true that we cannot help ourselves alone with these issues.... this is one of those things in life that takes working with others. It is a very powerful thing to be able to finally get the courage to disclose very private parts of yourself and your past with others, and to do it in a space that you know is safe AND with the knowledge that most of the others present have felt the same way, had similar experiences, or share just as much fear. It can be very liberating.

Please continue to write and/or read the posts here. I don't think that you'll hear anyone giving trivial advice or "canned" answers. Those are mostly reserved for people who don't understand what we're about. The folks here are genuine and accepting of each other.

SD

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There are no unresolved issues - they just didn't resolve themselves the way we would have liked. "Grinder and Bandler - Neuro-Linguistic Programming"