i've been isolated for soo long, and more often than not i don't trust anyone, or get hurt - just makes me want to stay alone. i just need friends, but i'm not happy go lucky, i'm intensely quiet and untrusting (at first and then generally, if you get to know me). my father so overbearing and actually incestuous and mother so not there, unbelieving and also incestuous (emotionally, if you can really simplify it to that) and so that's what i see and fear and eventually make in everyone (minus the overt sexual abuse). it's a sad life, and i'm just in the beginning of my recovery from "extreme" denial, but it seems so extreme to me...i've been trying to do things, and putting off living, but i can't anymore, i have to start living...it's like i'm starting now when everything else has already been going for years...it's scary! just venting. thanks