Hi
Just wanted to say hi and that I am the partner of a male survivor. We have definitely had our ups and downs, but even though we struggle sometimes we have ALOT of amazing experiences too. He is my best friend and there is a bond that we have because we've been through so much together - trying our best to just love eachother and grow without causing too much pain. It's hard though because sometimes I don't think we are at all like the "white picket fence" story that so many people think we should be. But in so many ways we have soooo much more than anyone could ever understand or that I could even try to explain. One of his best friends says that we have our own secret language and everyone knows we love eachother even if they don't always understand us. That is sometimes the hardest thing for me...people not understanding us. Our friendship is what has been the glue through our relationship...the only thing sometimes that gets us through I think. Sometimes love is really hard for him (in his own words) and I have my own fears and insecurities that are triggered by his fears and insecurties...aghhh! Pretty much a guy/girl thing alot of the time, but then add sexual abuse to the mix and it can get even more confusing!! I am just having a hard time right now because alot of people aren't understanding what we're going through right now...even though him and I are ok and we know we will be ok. Does that make sense??!! That's why I think other partners and survivors help so much. They understand the struggle and the growth and the even deeper love that can come out of it...which is what I feel in my heart.
I'm glad you are all here.
K