My abuser trained me to masturbate, excessively. Now, I do it, not compulsively, but habitually, daily. Most of the time, it's not remotely sexual; it's just something I should do ever morning. But I feel like this only reinforces the abuse and the ways I was trained to use myself for "feel good" experiences, that feel emotionally empty and damaging.
Have any of you had a similar experience? Has anyone found a path towards resolution with this impulse, a way to come to terms with that portion of the abuse or a similar form of abuse?
Strength in power is a false victory rooted in vapid grandiosity. Strength in character and integrity is the freedom to act righteously irrespective of the surrounding pressure. True power is the presence of mind to live with character and integrity.