Originally Posted By: gettingstronger
I guess my point is, if you're facing some sort of compulsive behavior, don't just engage in it. Try to break it down and find what it is that you're REALLY looking for. There's a reason for it, and more than likely it's a good reason that's just being fulfilled in an unhealthy way. I was able to break this compulsion without a T, and if I can, so can others.


i think you have a good point here. i used to have a huge phobia of wearing clothes that belonged to other people - hand-me-downs, 2nd-hand, borrowed - whatever. i have traced it back to the fact that when my mom married the step-dad, we moved into his house - full of all the things that had belonged to his original family - who were dead. i slept in his dead son's bed, played with his toys, played his trumpet, etc. whenever i wore the clothes that were not mine - it made me feel like i was disappearing and did not exist any longer.

later - i took the opposite approach - i would borrow (sometime without the owners' knowledge) clothes that belonged to boys that i admired or wanted to be like. i never kept them - but it made me feel like i was taking on some of their attributes - like i was becoming them for just a little while.

thanks for your post, gs - it helped me put it into clear thoughts and words.

LEE
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"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself... And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity." - Paulo Coelho