Thanks all, great insights. Like another survivor said, I (and all of us to some extent) was too busy taking care of everyone else's problems as a child too have any time to deal with my own, let alone do something like have FUN. God forbid!
Carving time out of my life to just goof off with friends is practically impossible but something I'm working on. I'm tired of feeling like a short-hop 737 flying from airport to airport around the clock and only stopping to refuel once in a while.
We all got screwed out of our childhoods in one way or another. I lost mine several years before my perp came into my life... Time to reclaim it. At least the "having fun" part!
Never worry about "three steps forward and two steps back." Thirty steps forward and twenty back are still ten steps in the right direction.