Lucy,

I didn't think I had anything to offer here, as I have a very close group of friends and have since high school basically.
But, truth be told, I believe I had these friends because I needed somewhere to go, they were my escape from the dysfunction of home my drunken abusive father.
The lesser of 2 evils if you will. I had to trust someone, and adults had proven untrustworthy to me.
I now view the early days of these friendships as crutches, I offered nothing, but wouldn't go away either, I had nothing else.

Eventually life happens and they became more than my crutches.
Telling them of my CSA, was not easy, but it did help cement our bond in my own mind.
These relationships are not without their own issues though. I became very angry with all of them for a time, after my son was born.
I felt they abandoned me, and I felt justified in cutting off all contact with them.
Some time in isolation helped me realize that being alone was less desirable than being insulted.

Even now, I can create problems in my mind about innocuous things they may have done or said, and the trust I had is gone, even if it is just temporarily.
I have learned to talk myself through these times, and realize the issue is with me not them.
Ultimately as others have said, it comes down to trust, the who is immaterial.
Just a little more food for thought.
_________________________
Presence is the key, for all we have is now.
All we ever have is right now.

Formerly Adam A Gedman (AKA - A damAGed man)

But you can call me Kevin

Toronto Mini WoR - May 2014