Antonio, I can feel your pain Brother. I am in similar position with my wife. The difference is I do have sex, wonderful sex with her. My problem is that I still have certain male attractions that confuse the hell out of me. Why would I possibly want to be with a man, sexually. My abuser was a male, 20 years my senior, yet I will still be around certain men and become aroused, both emotionally and physically. It's absolutely ridiculous to me. I hate it, I have never acted upon it since being married. I like many survivors have had a few encounters post abuse with men, but they have always made me feel sick afterwards. As far as the divorce, we were close to that at one point, then I told my wife of the abuse. She was supportive, a little confused as to what to do but generally supportive.

Have your told your wife of your abuse? I don't know your situation, but I felt certain my wife would leave me if she found out that I was "less than a man" (my words) not hers. I was very surprised to find out otherwise. She told me on more than one occasion since, that my confiding in her was the manliest thing I had ever done.

I can't tell you whether to divorce or not, however, I can tell you that this has been a hell of a lot easier with her loving support. I hope this helps, take care Brother.

Brian