i have a question for all of the wives/girlfriends of survivors
for those of you who experience distance within your relationships, how do you go on day by day with the distance that is created between you and your partner? how does it feel when you are around other couples? how do you fight the feelings of yearning for that to be you and your partner? how do you fight the feelings of loneliness and the constant thoughts of feeling desired by your partner?
my boyfriend has been so withdrawn and isolated for the last little while due to his depression and i have barely seen him lately. i know it's not his fault and i don't blame him nor am i upset with him, but sometimes i feel so lonely and yearn for him to desire to be with me as most other people in relationships do for their partner. it's the weekend, and i am spending my friday night posting this post rather than being with my boyfriend because he does not want to spend time with me (or anyone else really)
do you ever feel like your feelings don't matter? the distance hurts because he is so isolated and is in his own world, isolated from everyone else. all i do is think of him and wonder if he is okay and it hurts because sometimes i wonder if he is thinking about me at all through all of this; he told me specifically that this has nothing to do with me and that i should not take it personal and that he is just going through a very rough time right now.. all he likes to do when he is depressed is be by himself and not talk to or see anyone, he just watches tv, sleeps and maybe exercises a bit.. i already feel hopeless that i can't help him or make him feel any better, but i wish i could just sit next to him during these times and hold his hand, but he won't see anyone when he is feeling like this.. i try to give him space by not contacting him for a day or two sometimes but it's hard not talking to him but i know that with severe depression sometimes even just sending a text to someone can take a lot out of you so i would never pressure him and honestly i completely understand all of this and support him, but can't help but feel sad sometimes
when we are together it's wonderful and i can really feel the love he has for me, and when he is not depressed he is very sweet and caring, but i guess since this phase of depression has been going on for a little while now i am just a little lonely
just wondering if any of you can relate? would love to hear your stories and how you deal with issues relating to withdrawing and distancing
thanks for your time