Just wanted to introduce myself. Iīm a 47 year old man whose abuse didnīt last that long but had profound psychological effects. I guess it lasted one summer and one fall, but at one point I literally thought it was the end of my life (I was 4) and when I started to remember it seems my life just went to hell. Of course the effects showed up before my memories, I acted out pretty heavily with adult men from the time I was about 10. That stopped at about 14 but when I went off to college and came out as gay, boy things got really weird really fast. After a couple of years of hopping from one bed to next almost nightly, I met my first boyfriend. After about five years with him I started remembering what had happened. Our relationship couldnīt hold up to the pressure and soon ended. Pretty soon I found someone else,unfortunately very verbally and emotionally abusive. Finally got out of that after 14 years, with nothing but the clothes on my back. My life pretty much fell apart and I came to live in Mexico with me retired parents. I did meet someone down here whoīs love helped me heal in ways that I didnīt even know were broken. And then he was murdered by an insane gardener who was working for us. My world fell apart again. 3 months later my mother died. That was two years ago. I stopped drinking two months ago after 30 years. Iīve been seeing a really good psychologist for about 6 months. Iīm better, but such a loooong way to go. Thanks for listening.