Guys, thanks so much for the advice. It is what you all said. 'Those people' are not going to change. Those people are pretty much irrelevant in my life, and have been for such a long time. And its not my problem. Whatever the brother's opinion is... its not my problem.

And the son... I did share with him when he stopped in...Son said, "Dad, I am not letting Uncle XYZ steal one minute of my joy when I am with my Grandma."...
... not one minute... boy was I proud. .... and I am moving to a new thread because my heart is just racing with a new realization.... maybe more!

thank you again, men. just thank you. family of origin is still a hot button issue at times...
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For now we see through a glass, darkly.