why the f&*k would you finally do your formal disclosure and lie??

It is a process. Male survivors have been "lying" about what happened for years and decades. It is a good thing that he is able to disclose. It is impossibly difficult to continue to hear lies. I support a survivor, I feel your struggle.

Sometimes we have to pick up the good and wipe off the outdated coping mechanisms such as lying, passive aggressive behavior, acting out. Celebrating small steps of progress can feel like we are betraying ourselves, but it is the best we can do for our survivors. For us, the best we can do is to temper our emotional responses, to find outside support and fill our reserves with patience as we are resolved to continue supporting.

MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014