Focused, can relate to both points - about the 'friend', and issues with the mother.
A bit off-topic I guess, but my ex was well into this psychic, past-lives kind of thing and it did some real damage to my sense of logic...it took quite a lot of time to recover mentally for sure.
I can also understand what you mean about taking things slowly. I think you know from my post a few weeks earlier about 'forgiveness'...I had tried the karate-chop method trying to do things abruptly and it ended up being some sort of mental bombshell. The dependency and the covert incest - I think it's so difficult because it's after all the person who gave birth to you. It's just so crazy. There might be some sort of biological/genetic thing inside us that wants to love our parents unconditionally, but that I think also comes at the expense of emotional and mental health...recipes for a vicious cycle.
"What gives light must endure burning." - Viktor E. Frankl