To fixate: Verb
Cause (someone) to acquire an obsessive attachment to someone or something: "fixated on photography".
Acquire such an obsessive attachment to: "it is important not to fixate on animosity"

To meditate:
Verb
Think deeply or focus for a time for spiritual purposes or to relax. Think deeply or carefully about (something).

I find I fixate on negative, shocking, traumatizing things while I know I can resolve these by creating a plan of action and then working through the plan. The problem is I do not have any PROOF that the plan will work, so I go back to fixating.

Fixating sucks the energy from my positive acts. I can do three of four positive things for myself and others, then literally become destroyed by fixating on abusive actions.

I have seen some success in meditating, but no pill, no drink and no coping mechanism can work through fixating. I have to resolve the fixating, but I was never taught how.

I want to know how. I am beginning it understand that I can react appropriately when a situation arises. I want that.

Sam
_________________________
My SENSITIVE Difference

"Lets talk about that."

Go Get A Hug: HUG>porn

*When provoked* "Anyone holding back his sayings is possessed of knowledge. (Proverbs 17:27)"