Born before his time
premature the doctor said
oxygen tents and low birth weight
can anyone tell yet?

four he was put outside overnight
hungry he ate the cat chow
wasn't all that bad
and it felt warm in his belly

six he was snatched from the shower
the leather belt wide and sharp
wet legs and ass striped red
shame and embarrassment won't ever leave

Seven he learned to play the game
you put it in your mouth
odd that it never felt wrong
should have guessed then he was gay

Eight he said no, he was afraid,
"don't be a baby", He was told
like the magazine showed
time stopped when it went inside

twelve he was perfect at it,
he kept going and didn't stop
the taste was awful but
he started to like it

fourteen the man said he liked him
he made his tummy feel funny
gave him gifts and smiled so nice
whats a little reward?

Fifteen his mother asks questions
FEAR --She Knows!!
No, nothing happened....
OTHERS saw you naked!! BAD BOY

Sixteen his mother asks,
why do you talk so much?
Why always about this man?
Did you love him?

Seventeen his brother attacks,
blames it all on his gay sibling,
"I have a girl now"
He pines for his incestuous lover

Twenty Five he marches,
He gets fired for being gay,
He starts his first abusive relationship
He finally breaks it off

Thirty two, his spouse says,
"your old, no one cares it is your birthday"
it was a gun rubbed in his face,
as she told him why she was leaving.

Forty, his boyfriend hits him
he easily out weighs him
hitting the younger lighter man proves nothing
it only makes him feel more impotent.

Forty two, finally meets a good T
Does some work and gets healthy
learns to say "no" and "Gets Lost"
learns to break silence

Forty five, happy and married
husband gets weird every time I talk about it
he remembers nights when the PTSD kicked in
I still dream about sex.......

To Be Continued.....

Forty five, he surrenders,
Accepts it all
"no more secrets" they kill.
the family hates him still.