When I try to worship, to genuinely give myself to my God, I find that reading in His Word, when I begin to feel my zeal empower me, that almost immediately I feel the fear of failure. Past demons of mistakes and error pile up, then anger at the mistakes of others, then an overwhelming fear that I.., will be taken away from my God.
This struggle between the "man of Spirit" and the "man of Flesh", it is eating out the strength I have and keeps me hidden from my Heavenly Father's kindness. Oh that I could, as Jesus did, show his face to those who would spit upon him, and give his back the the strikers.
MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014