Hello Dear members,

I am looking for fellow members advice on how to be ready for being exposed in an online sexual abuse scenario. How to deal with it emotionally, and how to cope with family/friends and any emotional damage. Of course I realize my situation is much less troublesome than many of the horror stories I have read n that forum, but it is still very hurtful so that's why i would appreciate any advice. Any free online support-groups that i could join?

Story below:

Iím in that unfortunate situation ,a disturbed woman fiend of mine is currently threatening to abuse me by exposing digital recordings of me to everybody I know in case I abandon her or date other women for some time till I finish my study stay in my country. Concerning following through the threat and how, she already copied all my email contacts from my iPhone behind my back after one big fight, then much later
Concerning owning up to the people I know (family/friends) about the crazy situation, its humiliating, specially family and close friends. Many people don't understand and judge or feel disgust from kink or fetishism which is exactly the problem. Mainly its female dominance-or they call it femdom, with me being submissive, following orders, .. etc. which is something that was a fantasy of mine, but lucky me got to realize the hard way that some people don't have the ability to differentiate between fantasy and role-play versus reality. I realize it has been the wrong shit with the wrong person in the wrong time-the stupid way!! Now in her tantrums she keeps saying Iím no longer her friend because I treated her badly when we stopped the kinky stuff, and even if we are not doing it anymore, mentally she sees me as her slave, and I better do what she wants or keep the peace or else I will get punished!! I guess that having kinks isnít something super weird in the west I guess - but I am not totally sure in Eastern cultures, and I think its common but I think specially my native friends home would really be shocked.

Would you or anybody know what kind of legal action can I take if she didn't yet do anything?

For people who donít want to hear the whole story I am mainly looking for help on what to do and what are the options I have. Itís a long story so I will provide it in a separate post: warning> it is long!


Now one of the things I would really want to know is how weird or let me rephrase it how bad would it be if she carries through? That is a MENTAL COMPARISON that keeps going and going in my mind, WHICH IS WORSE?

1) Living the foggy surreal bizaroo world with her and getting alienated fro my friends, or :

2) Getting exposed. Iím currently living the first option, but very terrified by the second one- may be that's why Iím sticking to what i already know and hoping it doesn't get worse, and maybe when Iím gone from this country to anywhere else she will let me go peacefully without any further threats of abuse or emotional blackmail. I am in a critical stage in my studies and career (PhD last year)- thesis defense coming in 6 months so life is already super hectic and very stressful, and lonely in a foreign country; and that's why I am maybe taking the crap hoping this nightmare will end soon with minimal damage.

>I don't know if I am right or wrong and which decision to take, I am really depressed and have dark thoughts, its surreal, and is never ending, I feel so stupid, and while I acknowledge my stupidity , I still think I donít deserve that amount of craziness, abuse, and misery. Next thing to do is I will look up what are the legal options I have.

Thank you very much and sorry for the long story.

Nizar