Abuse has to be unwanted at the time and/or damaging and regretted afterwards. It is unavoidable, and (as I think Chase Eric aptly put it) there is a winner and a loser.
Experimentation - homoerotic horseplay - among boys of similar age is perfectly normal, sometimes even beneficial if it brings friends closer together. You don't seem too disturbed by mutual manual contact, and I think all in all you shouldn't be.
Pouncing you in your sleep and attempting sodomy, is a whole nother animal. That was abuse or at least attempted abuse, and it does raise questions of how the boy would have known how to do such a thing.
So - he attempted to transition "good" experimentation into "bad" abuse, and you escaped, fortunately.
"Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of heaven just because it hasn't!" --Bugs Bunny