I did indeed.

Part 1:

Part 2 (at the bottom):

Hope this is in some way helpful. It very significantly helped me. Overall since then, Dad has been this super-optimistic cheerleader and masculinity-reassurance-provider, while Mom has taken to getting angrily drunk and fixates regularly on the safety of my 9-year-old nephew. Her latest kick is that my sister must take down all of his pics from Facebook. I didn't have the heart to tell her that, statistically speaking, he is at more risk from his 14yo cousin than some Facebook stalker.

I think that counts within the margins of "good possible parental responses."

Your situation sounds terribly painful - reminders in your face, in your family, every day. Bottom line - if you want to tell your dad, do it. Parents exist to make their kids feel better, not the other way around. It all gets paid forward anyway.

My story

"Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of Heaven just because it hasn't!" --Bugs Bunny