31yrs later the locks of that door are opening & its affecting my day to day life.
It took me 42 years to begin coming to terms with what happened to me at 13. It took me 10 years of therapy, before I could actually say the words. The good news it that I finally did it and am making progress. You will too if you do the work fearlessly and don't give up.
Be aware that not every therapist is trained for dealing with CSA trauma. Read the thread here on how to pick a therapist for help: A Consumer's Guide To Therapists
. If your current counselor isn't working out, don't be afraid to change. This is about YOU!
Good luck and keep asking for help. You will always get it here.
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "Joni Mitchell