Excelent post and questions.
I think this is not an easy questions for me to answer.
I honor my hart always in that I don't discount or minimize the importants of what I need and feel. I have had to deal with a lot of confusion and conflict when it comes to what my hart seems to want. I have learn to ask my self a lot of questions, like what do I realy want? I have found that getting down to the deep often young needs and desires of the hart is a bit difficult. Often for me they are covered by layers of extra meaning and painfull memories. But when I get past all the distortions, confusion and pain, I usually get down to something that look like a unerversal human need.
Being known for who I realy am
Giving and receiving comfort
Having meaningful connections with others
Experiencing the fullness of my life with in meaningful relationship
Becoming more and more whole and compleat
And the like.
I have had to come to the realization that the damage that I have received and the damage that I have caused my self and others in reaction to the original damage has been tremendous and far be on my ability manage.
My hart has taken me on a bunch of long walks on short piers, and seems to prefer to often be leading me to the porvierable sloughter. Step by little step.
When I ask myself what am I realy feeling? It help me get in touch with the underlining basic need.
I think that this helped me see the disruption more clearly and distinguish it from the legitimate underling need.
The problem that I see is that the disruptive distortive needs do not realy ever get met. They just become biger and want more but never lead me to being truly happy.
For me I have learned that going counter intuitive on what I want sometimes allows for a more happy outcome. So I supose I am becoming truly happy by not following my hart unless it meets at least one of the underling true needs and does not take away from any of the others. If that makes any sense.
Edited by SmartShadow (02/13/13 03:49 PM)
Note to self:
Stand up and keep your footing,
You are not alone. This place is full of people who will reach out to help.