Matt:

All of what you are going through seems understandable given how recently it was that your inner walls came down.

What concerns me is how polarized your discussions are with her. Such as when she says that you may be keeping secrets from her. I wonder if in some way she is afraid of this unknown part of you and she equates that with keeping secrets. You might tell her that it is one thing to have the memory back, but it is another to recover what was lost. Maybe you are keeping something from her, but as of yet don't even know what that is.

I also wonder if Judith Herman's book, Trauma and Recovery, might be better reading. It is insightful and covers all kinds of trauma. It might give you some more middle ground to refer to. And it has the whole process laid out and understood, which helps to clarify how it is a process and not something that you move on from.

Keep posting so that you can stabilize....
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Lose the drama; life is a poem.