What was it like when your partner started healing and making some changes for the better? Although my husband has a long way to go, he is improving and doing better since he started therapy. The problem I am facing now is that since he is doing better, I feel worse! I am so proud of him, but I am having a very difficult time adjusting to this new person. I have spent the last two years not trusting him, dealing with codependency issues, waiting for the next blowup that those things are what I know...I have changed so much during this time that I didn't realize just how engrossed in his issues I had become. And now that he is proving himself more and more, I am the one disappointing him with my untrusting questioning.
I apologized to him for questioning his motives during this time where he is really trying to be better. He forgave me, but he also said, "This train is leaving, so you better hop on board." I guess he meant that he is going to continually get better, so I better get ready for it.
It's weird that you wait and wait for the day to come where he finally starts to have some better days. You think you are ready, but instead it feels so shocking because during that time you have been waiting for him, you too have changed.
Anyone have any thoughts on this? Similar feelings when your husband started improving? Don't get me wrong, this is all great and I will find a way to "hop on board," but I am so surprised by these emotions I'm experiencing related to his healing.