Originally Posted By: 1lifenow
I found the sense of shame and guilt the hugest hurdle in my recovery process.

Hi 1Life,

You statement above is very true. Shame is one of the signature outcomes of CSA and its been hard to shed. I had to hear "it wasn't your fault" about 100 times before I could even begin to buy in to it. And facing the damage I have done to others in my life continues to be a source of shame for me.

I do take issue with your assessment of AA though. I have 16 years of sobriety through AA and it has definitely worked for me. The program as I understand it does not emphasize shame, it emphasizes complete honesty about your shortcomings and failures, and responsibility for your actions and choices. Identifying yourself as an alcoholic in front of others is an exercise in honesty, and is an opportunity to overcome shame.

Not all AA groups practice the same and I'd suggest you consider trying a few different groups to find one that doesn't trigger your sense of shame so much.

Seems I've got to have a change of scene
Every night I have the strangest dreams
Imprisoned by the way it could have been
Left here on my own or so it seems
I've got to leave before I start to scream
Joe Cocker