Glad that you're in open dialogue with your wife about the stress you are experiencing at this time. She sounds like an understanding and supportive person. I think these things are helpful in dealing with stress and feelings of vulnerability. It sounds like you have a lot of insight into what's going on within you right now, and this helps too.
It sounds to me, from your description of your dream, like your unconscious is processing some of your feelings of vulnerability and stress while you sleep. Here's my quasi-Freudian interpretation of your dream: Because your brain associates sex with these feelings, it created this "acting out" scenario in the safe environment of your unconscious where it could be acted out/expressed without you having to deal with all the negative consequences of acting it out in reality. I would say that the release of the tension, associated with stress and vulnerability, that comes from having these type of dreams is a safe way to discharge the buildup that eventually has to be released somehow. Glad you're talking about this with your wife and at MS also.
I see recovery as a lifelong journey rather than a final destination, a journey, though, which can have many successes along the way.
WoR Alumnus - Hope Springs, OH, October 2009
My avatar is the farmhouse at the Hope Spring, OH WoR. It's a nice place.