I'm afraid I don't have much insight as a spouse would...but I still want to take this opportunity to say how I'm sorry about her reaction to your pain. I hold out hope that this a roadblock that you both can get around quickly.
Perhaps she is suffering a bit from postpartum depression amplified by Sandy and your realization of the CSA? She may feel left out and detached from your struggle and exacerbates it by lashing out...which creates a vicious cycle. She may feel her own problems are second string compared to having young kids to care for...and a husband who needs additional consideration---right or not...
Obviously, I'm stumbling around in the dark for an answer, but by all means continue to see your T. You may need an MS holiday and some time away together sans kids to reconnect and talk about the news of the day...whatever you both want that to be.
You take a walk and you try to understand
Nothing can hurt you
Unless you want it to... R.E.M./Pylon "Crazy"
My Story: Cruel Summer