You are not to blame. And (in my opinion), you don't have to love her. Love and forgiveness are gifts, and we sometimes happier and healthier if we decide to give those gifts -- but since they are gifts, no one can force us to give them.
"As long as the child within is not allowed to become aware of what happened to him or her, a part of his or her emotional life will remain frozen . . . all appeals to love, solidarity, and compassion will be useless."
-- Alice Miller