my partner got help....i was always there for him. he had memories coming up, he had all sorts of things. at anytime i was there for him. he also got therapy. he goes there regularly and from the therapist saying he should be admitted (which didnt happen) it came to the same therapist saying he needs to only come when he feels the need of it and not regularly anymore.
as a partner, you need your survivor to KNOW that s/he can be completely honest to you. dont judge him/her on the perversions which are a result of the abuse. you need to see the fact that s/he has a right to become the person the survivor would have been without the abuses s/he faced as a child. never stop believing that. that is very important.
my partner can talk about everything to me. he told me when he used to sexualize children. he told me he cant see kids as kids. he told me when he masturbated with the fantasy of a small skinny work colleage. he needs to be able to be totally open and you need to seperate what he did from what he was made to do. if you are strong enough to do that, you are a very essential support for your partner and healing goes well. it will change your whole relation and after some months or years (months in my case) you will end up with a very honest, loving and caring person beside you, you can trust and rely on.
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everything is always okay in the end, if it's not, then it's not the end