my name is Mick and I'm a survivor of early childhood sexual abuse. Although I suspect multiple perps, including my mother, my father abused me until he left when I reached puberty. I don't have much to go on in terms of "real" solid memories. I'm dissociative to most of the abuse and other parts of my childhood. The memories seem to creep in like feelings of déjà vu that are randomly triggered by such things as touch, smell, visuals and (of course) sexual stimulation.
I'm single, approaching 40 and my life's basically a mess. I've spend almost 6 years working with a therapist and don't feel it got me very far to be honest. I'm not sure what to expect from being here, I really hope that I can get myself to dig in the dirt again. After I parted ways with that therapist I've been kind of going through the motions without any sense of direction, as if I'm having a constant brain fog when it comes to issues of abuse and recovery.
Thank you for reading and I'm looking forward to get to know you guys.