I have sexual attraction to young males. Not guys my age (early 30s) or even teens. I just have them. I know a few males in my family have the same but towards females. I often wonder if my abuse and my identity are related or just really bad luck. Fortunately, I have learned that my attractions are alike to drug addiction so I managed to control it by understanding it. It's hard. It's a feat that I have not turn to drugs to cope.
In exchange for controlling it, I have found myself becoming more and more isolated from people my own age. They are getting married, having kids, etc. I haven't even kissed a girl let alone had sex with one. Not to say marriage is a good thing; so many men are miserable in it but I am so unhappy. I feel like the kid in high school who eats lunch alone. It's not fun. I have met a few guys with the same attractions but they are just freaks in the sense that they would fuck anything. I'm not posting this so people can tell me 'it'll be okay' or to see a therapist (which I already do) or to lecture me. I'm just getting it off my chest.