Welcome, odie!
you will find many kindred spirits here - guys who relate to different details of your story.
congrats on the progress you have made already.
may your time spent with us be another giant step in your healing.
you are not alone.
Lee
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"That you are here - that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. . . What will your verse be?" Robin Williams as John Keating in "Dead Poets Society"