Welcome, odie!
you will find many kindred spirits here - guys who relate to different details of your story.
congrats on the progress you have made already.
may your time spent with us be another giant step in your healing.
you are not alone.
Lee
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"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself... And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity." - Paulo Coelho