My husband is completely spiraling - distancing, running, staying out all night, drinking, smoking pot, other women.
At first, I thought everything going on was because he was unhappy in our marriage, that he thought I became a nagging bitch due to hormones and lack of sleep after the baby was born, that he thought he lost me, something I did made him feel I didn't love him anymore...
But after going on this site and reading others' stories, it seems like classic behavior. Does this happen a lot after having a child? I'm guessing that having a baby can trigger all sorts of emotions, from added stress to thinking about one's lost childhood.
I'm not sure what to do. Our beautiful, joyful, magical baby boy is turning one soon and his father isn't really around or reliable. I know that he's in pain, but he's turned it on me, that I'm to blame because I don't trust him.
He thinks that he'll move out for a few months, work on things and come back, but I doubt this to be true, especially with his current state.
He doesn't think I know about the CSA, but I do. So I can't recommend he check out websites like this for support.
He started seeing a shrink which was a huge step for him, but I think the guy prescribed bad meds for PTSD which kicked off the drinking and drug use.
Klonopin and prozac combo. Anyone have experience with klonopin? I called the doctor when I thought the meds were having a bad effect and his therapist (who he rarely sees) also expressed her concern that he was off.
And the guy must be a quack because he told my husband that we were trying to interfere and let him do his job.
I know that klonopin is used with caution for PTSD and I don't know if this dr knows about his past and the drugs/drinking.
The drinking has me really scared not just because it's bad to mix with klonopin, but because my husband hates alcohol. His father was an abusive alcoholic (so he had that before he was sexually abused for years)and he's also a Muslim. He hasn't had anything to drink for a very, very long time.
I know everyone talks about tough love and setting boundaries. I just don't know what to do. He hasn't officially moved out yet. He's just not around, stays out all night, comes and goes when he wants to see the kid or the other night when he came home drunk and admitted he missed me and begged me not to leave him. I also support him financially because he's a student and I can't afford to pay for two households as well as the daycare I now have to pay for since he's not reliable as the caregiver.
What should I do? I've trying to focus on myself and the baby and I know it's not my fault, but it doesn't make things less heartbreaking and terrifying.


Edited by remaininghopeful (12/30/12 09:13 PM)