I'm so sorry HD, but I'm up the same creek as you are. My husband volunteers for after-hours duty all of the time, and when he's home he's either glued to the computer or playing his latest video game.
Also, when I try and talk with him, his favorite answer is "I don't know". I stopped trying to show interest in what he's doing or things that interest him because he literally laughs me off, like it's funny that I'm trying to talk about his video game or show interest in one of his TV shows.
What's even more frustrating is that therapy doesn't seem to be helping anything because he's not honest. He's not honest and his perception of every situation we discuss is polar opposite of reality.
I'm so sorry