Hay cosmos, I am with you. Big citys are no place to live. The five + dream is doable. Life is all about chooses. But yea as Jude said no mater where you go, there you are, but u might as well look out at cows and JD. Iam with you. So it's simple. You start with where you are at. You "pick where you want to end up"
That's the hard part. The idea of something is often better then the reality and you have to sort through all of the implication of a long term plan. But it's like a garden. The idea comes first. Your wife wants what you want just in a difrent order. She need to know your serious about the dream and that you will stick with it and make it happen. She needs to know she is not only in the the dream but its her you want to do the dream with. Selling the plan takes time. You half to help her catch the dream. Lots of fears to help them get past. Security is the main need. That means all kind of stuff. But wifes are good at telling you what that means if you ask and realy want to know. Then just work all that stuff in to the plan. Find the common ground and make it the foundation of the plan. Rember you want to retire in this place. Think about what would still work 25 years from now. ie somebody else owns the cows on the adjacent 80. You get the benofit of you neighbors dream to. Begin with the end in mind and fill in the rest. Baby steps.
It's sound like you have a good idea about what you want. Selling the dream takes time and positive energy. Be persistent yet patient. Get excited about anything your wife wants that fit into that dream. This process could take time. All good thing do. Lastly the plan needs to work on paper. Maybe you keep your curent job for a wile. But hay you get to come home to what looks like a good place to call home. It takes a lot more work to and effort to get our wife on the same page, but hay by the sound of your wife, once on board she do a lot of the work and help make the dream even better then you could on your own.
I believe this is doable for you as well.
I pray for for your dream, you and your wife, the cows but mostly for the JD.
doing the journey with your wife trumps the farm.
But man the farms a real good addition.
And maybe a dog