hey my friend
I hope that you can find in yourself the strength to remember that your living a good life is the ultimate slap in the bastards face. he did all he could to destroy you totally body mind and spirit. You have shown him who is not only the better man but the only good man in the race. Hold on for yourself my friend, because you never deserved to be treated in that way,and you deserve better now. Your life is yours and he cannot take anymore you have that right. Grieve this loss again man then look the bastard straight in the eye even in your minds eye and tell him I WILL NOT! let you have one more day you son of a bitch! Then we pick up and start again prepared to just keep saying it till eventually it is less,or gone.
Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee. let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"