I feel like I should tell my parents what happened, but I'm afraid to.

Firstly, I'm not sure if they're even aware that homosexuality exists, much less that men can assault boys. Growing up, I never learned the Cantonese words for homosexuality or pedophiles.

If they have heard of homosexuality, they probably view it as a mental illness. I'm afraid that will be disgusted at my role in what happened.

Secondly, I'm afraid of exposing them to my pain. They were greatfull that my perp spent time with me and treated me like an American boy, despite being the only Chinese kid in town. They pressured me to stay in scouting when I wanted to quit due to the abuse. I don't want let them down by letting them know how badly I was hurt.