Here is a read you might find interesting, and that might shed more light on the likelihood (or rather, lack thereof) of your boyfriend being a paedophile: http://www.taasa.org/library/pdfs/TAASALibrary108.pdf
It discusses the study that forms the basis on which most of the research into this so-called "vampire myth" is based.
Although a comparison of the sex offender group to the control group is inappropriate due to the differences in data collection, it is conceded that sex offenders in this study do appear to have a high rate of sexual trauma. That is, until the types of sexual trauma are reviewed. Six percent of the "trauma" involved "a sex-stress situation where the anxiety resulted from family reaction to the discovery of the subject's involvement in sexual activity" (p. 13). Examples given included punishment for masturbation. Three percent witnessed "upsetting sexual activities, usually on the part of their parents" (such as catching them having sex) (p. 13). Eight percent "suffered some sexual injury or physiological handicap" (p. 13). One example cited included a man who had been in a motorcycle accident and was fitted with a penile prosthesis due to erectile dysfunction.
Most experts in the field today would not consider these to be equivalent to the type of childhood sexual assault normally considered in "abuse to abuser" scenarios. If these cases are subtracted, the overall incidence of sexual assault falls from 30% to 13%. Further, "sexual trauma" by a same-aged or younger "assailant" occurred in 30% ofthe "traumatized" rapists and 16% of the "traumatized child molesters"
. No statistical analyses were conducted in this study.
From the data presented, it would appear that sex offenders have a similar or lower incidence of sexual assault by adults than the general population.
Not surprisingly, on-duty police officers also appear to report lower rates of sexual trauma than the general population. This frequently cited paper, in spite of its methodologic flaws, therefore supports the exact opposite hypothesis, that is, that abuse does not predict a predisposition to becoming a sex offender. Unfortunately, this fact has not been communicated to many victims of sex crimes (particularly men) who worry that they will inevitably become like their assailants.
Do read the full article. It's very enlightening.
When I was younger, I was also told "It would be safer for you to not have children". It hurt like hell, because for years, I believed that I would abuse any children I had. Until the day I tested the facts, and realised that I have never had any inclination to have any kind of sexual contact with a child, nor have I ever fantasised about it. I have had dreams and being a molester, but those dreams were as upsetting - even traumatic - as dreams about my own abuse.
I am a survivor of sexual abuse.
And I'm a DAMN good father.
Take care of you children and do everything in your power to keep them safe, but at the same time, please judge your boyfriend by the man that he is, and not by what was done to him when he was a defenceless child.