My mother is in her 80's and while she seems to be doing fine for her age she is not in the best of health and I feel that knowing about my CSA would be too hard for her. Someone else with a different mother could decide that it is better to tell her and I would not say they were wrong. Each person has their own situation and perspective and must make up their own decision.

Do people get over this? Yes they do. But it will always be a part of you. Hopefully a small part without shame or pain.

Should you keep this from a spouse? I think in most cases you need to tell them. If you plan to make that kind of commitment then you should have enough trust in them to know.

Your past should not determine your choice to have children. If you and your spouse want children then you should have children. If you have difficulty with the your past (and I expect the answer to be yes) and you feel it would hold you back then I would think getting some professional help about it would be a good idea. If you haven't then you should.

One added note. I wish I could have dealt with this when I was your age. I have lost so much and will not have the opportunities that you still have.


Edited by Candu (11/19/12 11:37 PM)
Edit Reason: added note