Congratulations on taking the steps you have undertaken. It takes a great deal of courage to do what your doing. We all are on the same bus here....no stops till we get to the other side. Don't worry you already paid for your ticket. Do the work of recovery and you'll be a better man in the long run.
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "Joni Mitchell