I want to survive. I am beginning my journey to recovery.
Welcome. You have accomplished your first goal. You SURVIVED! Now do what ever you have to to move forward in recovery. This website can be a big part of it, but its your recovery to pursue in your own way. Hang around, read posts, and when you're ready post something of your own. Good luck.
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "Joni Mitchell