i went back once to the house where it all started. we drove past it several times. it was before i revealed what had happened there to my wife. our kids were in the car and she was all excited - "Look: that's where your daddy lived when he was a little boy!" it was weird - they were so happy and i was aching and trying to act normal. it was - of course - much smaller - and more innocuous - than i remembered it. it just doesn't seem right that something that was so huge in your history can look so insignificant...

As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago