Iím not sure itís that simple? Itís kinda like a sick twisted catch-22. Wasnít everyoneís abuse a secret? Didnít the perp threaten to kill you or worse? Didnít you promise the perp youíd never tell? And now you want to tell your parents? I told my wife like you did but not under such demanding circumstances; and just uttering the words that I was raped to her caused me outrageous amount of pain; see I was the guy how would never tell no matter what, I couldíve been under pain of death I would never ďratĒ anybody out, never, and here I was ratting out my grandfather for fucking me. The catch here is the only way to freedom is to talk to someone about what happened, what your emotions are and were about the abuse and how to integrate your inhuman pain and suffering into your current life without feeling like a victim? Meaning telling other people simply to tell other people might just be your sub-conscious trying to maintain its victim role in your personality. See youíre not the victim anymore! Youíre talking about things that happened to you; sometimes the deeds need to be separated from the feelings; use your mind to analyze the thoughts and actions, use your heart, trust your heart, listen to your heart it will help guide you, youíre here talking like a man about things no person should ever be able to relate to, youíre not a victim anymore youíre a man!
Full disclosure my mom is the only surviving member of my family; she not only condoned my abuse; but over the years made horrible comments to me that I couldnít quite place until recently; so thatís my reality, no one else to tell; my sons why? However one of the first things the wife asked after I told her was, ďyouíre not going to tell anyone else; right?Ē I just laughed; canít let the neighbors know that Iím a ďsissy whoreĒ can we?
Not sure if this helps but itís where Iím at right now.
"When you're out of the blue and into the black."