male survivor here.
i am sorry for your situations, ladies - but gotta tell you - if you expect normal behaviour from a survivor - you will probly be disappointed. we all have our weird quirks and handicaps - some more severe than others.
i don't do well in crowds either - ok in a small mixed group of up to half a dozen. more than that makes me anxious. restaurant or movie or concert is OK - but not big social event where i am expected to mingle - big parties and conferences are the worst. no - groups of all men are the worst! i'm good with my wife inviting a couple or two to our house - not so good outside my home turf.
best you can do is find ways of having your own social life - whether or not he goes along. the pressure to be "normal" and act like everyone else just makes it worse - emphasizes the feelings of being an unacceptable, defective freak.
it is what it is - until he decides to change. i know from experience. change is possible - but hard and slow.
"Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself... And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second's encounter with God and with eternity." - Paulo Coelho