Welcome to MS. You've taken some important steps in recovery already. There will be difficult times ahead, but don't turn back. Theres a life ahead of you as a whole healthy man that you deserve to have. Whatever happened, it wasn't your fault. Keep writing.
"And God only knows
God makes his plan
The information's unavailable to the mortal man
We're workin' our jobs
Collect our pay
Believe were gliding down the highway
When if fact we're slip slidin' away"Paul Simon