San, you reacted as anyone who had your past would. Anyone who had been abused as a child would have a reaction like you did when you were being assaulted. As for the reaction of the Navy trying to "bury" the problem, it's not at all shocking for the timeline. They had no idea what to do with an assault like yours, they ran away, plain and simple. You didn't do anything, you were assaulted and no one did anything, they failed to give a soldier who sacrificied for his country the help he needed after being assaulted.

Good start coming to MS San, very resilient of you to recognize that those things are affecting you, and you need to change those things.

Tell yourself it will take time, there are no quick answers. It will be hard but it's worth it. you've already got a handle on what the problem is, focus on what you need to move on.

This is a great site, go look at the stickies here and try to work from that.

Stay strong San
Mike
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Thriving