ROE,
Sometimes I have really good moments with my H where I can get my point through. But most days, he is at work so late, or spends so much time to himself that we barely talk. And I keep reading about people setting limits...I wish I could! He will listen to me, agree with me, and say he will do something, but always does the opposite. Sometimes I wonder if he is trying to hurt me on purpose. He told me not too long ago that he screws things up sometimes so that I am mad at him and want to leave. Now my understanding of this is that he is so broken right now that he feels like he deserves the pain of me leaving. But my point is that the boundary thing isn't working for me.

Sometimes I feel like all hope is lost. I know things won't be normal again. I even told him that I will accept whatever our new normal may be. I just want to see that he is trying. I feel so desperate sometimes. It's really hard.