Hi Rachel - oh boy, I do have kids. Two. And I had that same thought in my head... they need their father and I need to fight for this family.

Before I write the next part, I will say something that I am working on in therapy. I FORGIVE MYSELF. I have compassion for myself as well as for others. Ok...

I kept them in a mess far longer than was necessary. Someone once told me that it is not the father leaving that hurts the kids as much as what is left of the mother. I was a mess. I let him hurt me and push me around. And that hurt my children. I didn't have boundaries and they watched that. It hurts to remember that time.

My son is 12. The month before I asked my husband to leave, he said two things to me - two things your baby can't say to you. 1. Why do you pay so much attention to someone who is hurting you? and 2. I like you better when Daddy is not here. The sacrificing yourself in the name of the kids thing... it doesn't work out like we plan.

Your child deserves healthy parents working to build a healthy relationship. Sometimes saying ENOUGH is what it takes for those two things to happen.