Originally Posted By: M. J. Stewart
[quote=Jude]Forgive the pedophile. This makes me angry. I want to piss on his grave. I want to see him burn in hell, and I want to be there to light the match. Forgive the man who drugged me, forced his dick down my throat and raped me? Forgive the man who filled me with anger, fear and self-hate? Forgive the man who caused me to turn to a lifetime of drugs and alcohol to blunt the pain he inflicted on me? Forgive the man who saw to it that I could never have a normal emotional or sexual relationship with another human being? Forgive the man who put the memories in my mind that still invade my days and nights, making me double over in pain? I DON'T WANT TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Still struggling with this. Forgiveness makes sense. I want to heal. I want to BE forgiven myself. I want to be a forgiving person. I sound like an angry asshole above. But it ALL just makes me so ANGRY. Wish i could just lay it all down, but I'm not there yet.

Jude
_________________________
"When I was a child
I caught a fleeting glimpse
Out of the corner of my eye
I turned to look but it was gone
I cannot put my finger on it now
The child is grown, the dream is gone
And I have become comfortably numb."
Pink Floyd