Have some of my own recent sh*t I'll at least be PM'ing you about Gary, so you'll remind me of my own glass-half-full stuff no doubt, right?
What I hear you saying is that you did a service to yourself and to us. Great! You did it, despite your anxiety. You just did it. No small feat, imo.
Here's another. You're not clairvoyant. You don't know who was affected by your presence or how they were affected. Well, at least that's a thot that helps me sometimes.
"The Answer to the Great Question Of Life, the Universe and Everything Is...Forty-two."