I so feel your pain buff. I recently came across a memory that is unpleasant too I try so hard not to think about scary things things I feel might be something I dont want to remember. truth is though there are some good memories too. and I dont know that we can get where we need to be without taking the risk of looking at these things. I really hope that this memory of yours is a hugely positive, wonderful memory but if it is not then we will be here.
Towards thee I roll, thou all-destroying but unconquering whale; to the last I grapple with thee; from hell's heart I stab at thee; for hate's sake I spit my last breath at thee. let me then tow to pieces, while still chasing thee, thou damned whale! Thus, I give up the spear!"